The days are longer when he's gone...
8:24 p.m. | 2005-01-10
I watched him press his hand against the passenger side window. Two fingers and a thumb pressed against the glass in the sign of love. His warm skin left an imprint on the cold frosted window. The rain fell, and as I drove away I watched his image fade in my rearview mirror.
I don�t know when he�ll be back.
He�s not sure either.
Work, or rather the lack of money took him away to Arizona to work with a friend of his fathers.
No warning. No preparation. Just one phone call on Saturday afternoon and he was gone by Sunday morning.
We haven�t been away from each other for more than 24 hours in the past year and a half.
It�s only Monday, and already I don�t know what to do with myself.
But it�s tomorrow I fear.
I wish I could fall asleep tonight and wake up sometime Wednesday�
Tomorrow is our anniversary.
The one day that comes once a year and I�m spending it alone�
My plan is to do nothing tomorrow. I�m calling in sick to work, I canceled my long awaited doctors appointment and I�m only going to school for one class that will be out by 11am. The rest of my day will be spent laying in bed, watching movies, and perhaps a few margaritas.
I feel miserable.
I feel like I�m half a person.
Sound crazy?
I know. It sounds absurd to me too, but I�ll never be able to explain what it is about him that makes me loose myself.
He�s not just some guy I�m dating; he�s not just a boyfriend. He�s my best friend. He�s the boy I fell in love with 8 year ago while I walked quietly behind him down the halls of our high school, just wishing he�d turn around�
Because of him, I know what unconditional love is.
I slipped a letter and a picture of us in his bag.
On the envelope I wrote �Tuesday��
Happy Anniversary to me�